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Welcome to Dying Out Loud. Today’s episode is unlike any we have ever recorded. There is no guest, no interview, and no holding back. Today, host Kris Saim reads a letter to his younger self—the boy who carried a secret so heavy he felt like the world had agreed to look away. For the first time in a public space, Kris is telling the whole truth about who he is and where he came from. In this profoundly vulnerable episode, Kris breaks a silence he has kept for nearly his entire life. He shares his story of surviving childhood sexual abuse from the age of four, the terror of growing up in a church that told him his identity was a sin, and the exhausting performance of living an unauthentic life until he finally came out at 31 years old. This episode explores: The Weight of Silence: How the secrets we keep to survive eventually become the walls that isolate us. Reframing Resilience: Why resilience isn't the absence of damage, but the stubborn decision to keep going anyway. The Danger of "Moving On": Why forward motion without acknowledgement is just running—and why your younger self deserves to be seen. The Unsent Letter: Kris shares his raw, heartbreaking, and ultimately empowering letter to the boy who bent, but did not break. This episode is for anyone who has ever felt like the truest version of themselves had to stay hidden. You are not broken. You are not damned. And you are not alone. (Please Note: This episode contains frank discussions of childhood sexual abuse, religious trauma, and body dysmorphia. Please prioritize your well-being and listen with care.)